I have debated about this post.  Should I or shouldn't I?  But no one reads this anyways so why not.  It is mainly just for me to write and think out loud if you will.  I have been thinking a lot about friends lately.  Feeling like I don't really have any.  But let's back up.  What is a friend?  Someone you talk with.  You tell each other what is going on in your lives.  Talk about things.  Help each other grow and laugh and cry.  Have good times with and sad times with.  True friends from far away you can pick up right where you left off.  I do have a couple of those far away friends.  Facebook has been great for keeping in touch.
But I have come to the conclusion that I don't have a close friend here.  I used to but things change.  People change.  Situations change.  The people I used to be close with have children younger than mine.  Some a lot younger.  They are involved in different organizations and things than me.  The one thing we seem to have in common is that we go to the same church but so do a lot of other people.  Do they call me to visit?  No  Do they stop by?  No  Do they invite me over?  No  One does invite me to movies and has invited me out to eat but when you have no money that is rather difficult to do and I will not make someone always pay for me.  Now before you go "Now Sharon, do you call them or stop by or visit"  I will say yes I have and did.  Invite over, no because my house is torn up and a mess but otherwise I would stop by and visit them or message or pull weeds or whatever.  And when one says "Oh did I tell you ...." And I say "No" they seem surprised they didn't but I could count on one hand how many conversations we have had in the last several months.
So this has made me think that maybe I need to look elsewhere for friends, maybe people closer to my age, people with kids all gone and such.  But you know, by then everyone is pretty well established in the friendship group thing.  And being single kinda makes a person odd man out although I am not sad that I am single.  I enjoy it actually.
Anyway, I do have a pretty good friend here but she and I can go a couple weeks without talking and then we will spend all day together watching movies, eating, talking!  It's great!  And we both have a lot of the same health issues so we can complain to each other!!  LOL  And maybe I need to get the depression and stuff under control before I can be good in the friend department.  I don't know.  But I also know it doesn't help the depression either, feeling lonely.  But I always have God!  He never leaves me or forsakes me!  He is always there and will never fail me.  I can count on that!